Posts Tagged: ipad

Apr 10

Midweek Thoughts – Part 15


Midweek Thoughts! Yay!

It’s a beautiful day today. It’s sunny and 51 degrees, and according to Accuweather we’ll reach a high of 75. My first thought upon exiting my apartment was, “wow, it’s much too nice out to be working today.”

But nice weather aside, it’s a blessing to have a job. It’s a blessing to be here at work today. There are so many people either out of work or working a low-paying job. Meanwhile I have a job that is consistent, pays decent, and allows me an extraordinary amount of freedom in how I conduct myself. (I get to set my own work schedule, vacation days don’t require advance notice, I can take my lunch break whenever I want, etc etc.) Nobody really cares how I do my job as long as the work gets done. So I guess my point here is that I’m happy to be at work today.

Conan is coming to TBS! I have to be honest, I don’t think I’ve watched TBS even once over the last three years. But that’s going to change in November! I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Conan O’Brien is a funny dude and his Twitter feed is hilarious! “Just got the new iPad. This amazing device has already revolutionized the way I use a calculator.” Now that’s a good tweet!

Speaking of iPads, I find it hilarious that a device can be considered “revolutionary” and “magical” when all they basically did was take a device that already existed and make it bigger. It’s a giant iPod Touch. Yay! When all of those Apple fanboys finally leave their homes and try to take the iPad with them, they’ll discover it doesn’t fit in their pockets. This will lead to a worldwide increase in the sale of man-purses. Hey, maybe Apple could release an official man-purse. They could call it… the iPurse!

And finally, it is perhaps the most exciting new product of 2010. KFC has released the “Double Down” sandwich. It’s the first mainstream sandwich I know of that replaces the bread with two big hunks of chicken.


Aside from the chicken “bread”, it also contains bacon, cheese and a special sauce.  Unfortunately, I can’t eat bacon (despite the fact that I love it) because pork upsets my stomach, and I don’t care for mayo. (The special sauce is based on mayo.) I do commend them for not putting any vegetables on the sandwich though. It’s perfect for your average obese carnivore. (Or aspiring obese carnivores.) If ever there was a sandwich made with a man in mind, it’s this one.

It’s also good for grossing out vegans if you’re into that sort of thing.

Mar 10

Midweek Thoughts – Part 11


In a recent news article circulating on the net, it was revealed that cops and law enforcement personnel are creating fake Facebook and MySpace profiles and “friending” suspects. It seems like we’re hearing more and more stories about criminals who get caught because they put too much info on Facebook. I think they should create a new social network just for criminals. Maybe they could call it ThugSpace and it could be advertised as “100% cop free.” It would, of course, be covertly run by cops.

I had some cheesy tater tots yesterday. They were pretty good. I must confess though, I cannot eat tater tots without thinking of Napoleon Dynamite. That movie is inspiring. Perhaps I should build my girlfriend a cake.

For all you out there who preordered the iPad, I’ve got one word for you. SUCKERS. You know, I was thinking about it and I think the iPad may eventually be a cool product. (Unfortunately, it will still probably be called the “iPad.”) The first generation iPad lacks so many features though, you’d pretty much have to be a chump to buy it. Heck, you can’t even browse 85 of the top 100 websites on the Internet properly because the iPad doesn’t support Flash. But Apple always intentionally holds back features so they can get their fanboys to buy each new model of each new product. What a scam.

Buying an iPad becomes even sillier when we consider that HP is set to release a tablet later this year. It’s called the HP Slate and will feature the full Windows 7 operating system. (In comparison, the iPad runs the iPhone OS. *chortle*) It will have a USB port too. (The iPad won’t have a USB port though, ‘cause if it did people wouldn’t have to buy special camera connectors and such. )

Check out this teaser video for the Slate. It’s just as pretty as the iPad but you can actually do normal Internet stuff on it like watch videos on Hulu. *gasp*

Feb 10

Midweek Thoughts – Part 5


Good news everyone! It’s time for the fifth installment of Midweek Thoughts.

Last week, Apple announced an extra-large iPod Touch that they renamed “iPad.” For a mere $499 to $829 (depending on features) you can own a 9.7 inch tablet “computer” that doesn’t multitask, support Adobe Flash, or even provide a USB port. And if you decide you want to load pictures from your camera, you’ll have to purchase a special camera adapter. I bet that adapter is really pretty and shiny. Great job naming the useless product too, Apple. Now every time women see an iPad they’ll be reminded of feminine hygiene products. Yay.

Sometimes when I order a bunch of stuff from Amazon, they’ll randomly ship one of the items through Fedex. This annoys me because then I get stuck waiting for two different delivery guys. But on the bright side, Fedex has never mangled a package of mine, so I’m fairly confident that my nifty new cooler will arrive safely.

The Fedex guy was just here delivering a package, but it wasn’t for me. Darn it! Their website claims my package is out for delivery. Are they really dispatching two different trucks to the same location? I guess that explains why their rates are so high.

The second Fedex guy was just here. Now I’m happy.