Posts Tagged: Walmart


30
Mar 10

Mmmm… Fruit Snacks

Fruit snacks are wonderful. If I were in charge of diplomatic meetings, when voices get raised, and shouting matches ensue, I’d break out the fruit snacks. “Gentlemen! Gentlemen! Sit down and eat your fruit snacks,” I would tell them. And they would comply because fruit snacks are delicious.

I don’t see how anyone could possibly feel sad, upset, angry or depressed while eating fruit snacks. So if you’re feeling a little low, I recommend you run out and buy some immediately. These smiley face fruit snacks from Walmart are a good choice.

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11
Jan 10

Fun at Walmart

walmart

The above image was scanned from an actual Walmart receipt. Notice how it says, “Fast. Fun. Easy.”? Fun? Really? They’re promoting the self checkout as fun?

I’ve had a few thoughts while using the self checkout. Thoughts such as, “Wow, this line is really long”, “Why won’t this darn item scan?”, or “Why does my signature on that electronic screen look like it was written by a three year-old?” One thought I’ve never had while using the self checkout is, “Wow! This is really fun.”

However, if Walmart says it’s fun, perhaps it is. Maybe I should spend my Friday nights just going through the self-checkout over and over again. I can see it now. “Umm, sir, why do you keep going through the self checkout over and over again?” “It’s Friday night and I just wanted to have some fun! This is how I party.”

By the way, I resent being ordered to save money and live better. You’re not the boss of me, Walmart!


9
Jan 10

“But you look so young!”

I got carded at Walmart yesterday over this item.

airduster

It’s not the first time I’ve been carded over a canned air duster, but it hadn’t occurred in a few years so I thought that perhaps I was finally starting to look older. I find it funny that at 26 years of age, people can still look at me and think, “Hmmm, he might be under 18.”

I have a young face. The truth is that at age 26, I look like I am perhaps 19 or 20. I’ve been asked my age many times over the last few years and have had some very shocked responses.

I recall  being asked why I was out on a school night when I was 18 or 19.

I remember at age 19 when a girl moved in across the street and asked my age, she didn’t believe me at first. I think she was disappointed because she was expecting me to be about the same age as her, and I was actually 3 or 4 years older.

In 2004, at age 20 I was asked by a clerk at the airport ticket counter how old I was. When I informed her that I was 20, she exclaimed, “but you look so young!” A few minutes later, an airport worker asked my ex-girlfriend if I was a minor.

At age 22, if I happened to be out walking around the time school let out, traffic guards would routinely stop the traffic for me.

And of course, there were always the occasionally people thinking that my YOUNGER sister is older than me.

To counteract the problem, I’ve kept facial hair the last couple years. It does help make me look a little older. I think if I shaved, people would begin asking me why I wasn’t in school. Heh.


3
Jan 10

Pummelo… What’s a pummelo??

Last night I decided to pay a visit to the local Walmart in order to procure some foodstuffs. Upon arrival, I entered the produce section. Feeling a need to be a bit more healthy in 2010, I decided to purchase some fruit.

I came across something unusual. “Hmmm, what’s this?” I thought to myself. “It’s some sort of citrus fruit the size of a small melon.” I checked the produce sticker, and it was labeled a “pummelo.” “Pummelo? What’s a pummelo?” I pondered. After deliberating for a few minutes I decided to invest $2.50 in this unusual fruit. I purchased it and took it home.

pummelo

So what is a pummelo? Well, that depends on where you’re from. A pummelo may actually be a pomelo, pommelo, Chinese grapefruit, jabong, lusho fruit, pompelmous, Papanas, shaddock, chakotara, or if you’re from the Indian state of Manipur, a Nobab. Uhh… yeah, but what is it, exactly? It’s basically like a grapefruit except less tart and much larger.

Of course, I didn’t know what it was when I bought it. And when I got it home, I wasn’t sure if I should peel it like an orange or cut it like a grapefruit. I decided to peel it like an orange, which as it turns out was the wrong decision. Doh!

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The fruit was very difficult to extract from the membrane. The membrane was quite bitter, so I didn’t really care to eat much of it. The peel was very thick, in fact, it was much thicker than any other citrus I’d eaten in the past.

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Overall the fruit tasted pleasant enough. But was it worth $2.50? Nah… not really. In the future, if I want a fruit that tastes like a grapefruit, I’ll probably just buy a grapefruit.