Posts Tagged: Wisconsin

Mar 10

The Dot Box

It was a warm sunny day in March when a man in the great state of Wisconsin spotted a Dot box sitting on his desk. “Surely I had previously consumed those delicious Dots”, the man thought to himself. “Perhaps I should dispose of the box.”


Intending to discard the box in a waste receptacle, our young protagonist was shocked to discover the box was not empty after all.


This was a lucky occurrence for our young fellow, because not only did the Dot box contain Dots, it contained yellow Dots – the flavor he favored most. “I shall eat those Dots, he thought to himself!” And so it was, that on that fine, sunny afternoon, he consumed the remaining Dots from the Dot box.

Upon consumption of the delicious Dots, the young man felt a bit melancholy and yet joyful as well. He was happy to have eaten the Dots, but sad that the Dot box was now empty indeed.


Mar 10

Welcome to the Men’s Room


The men’s room can be a scary place. I once witnessed four or five guys in a row walk out of the men’s room without washing their hands at East Towne Mall in Madison, Wisconsin. To make it even grosser, a couple of those guys were walking out of stalls. And to make it grosser yet, it was the men’s room next to the food court, so there’s a good chance those dudes were about to eat.

The men’s room is a rather unpleasant place and I usually try to get out of there as quickly as possible. Urinating in front of a urinal flanked by guys on each side doing the same is just… awkward for me. Of course, it’s a little better when a men’s room actually has a partition between each urinal. I think all men’s rooms should have partitions. In fact, maybe they should make it a federal law.

Yep, I’ve been in a lot of disgusting men’s rooms in my time. The ones in Kentucky were pretty gross. The ones in New York City were the worst ever. But I have to say, that one night when I stranded at O’Hare airport in Chicago, the men’s room was totally spotless and clean during the dead of night. I guess that was the only upside to being at that airport for 14 hours straight.

Anyway, it may seem germophobic, but I like to grab a piece of paper towel and hold it while touching the door in the men’s room. Maybe that thin little paper towel doesn’t actually help much, but it makes me feel better.

Feb 10

Day One of My Road Trip


I drove over 500 miles today. Today was day one of my 1000 mile journey to see my special friend, Leah. I’d never gone on a road trip of this length before. In fact, the longest road trip I had previously taken was only three and a half hours.

I started my journey at 7:22am central time. It took me nearly 90 minutes to reach the state of Illinois. I made the mistake of wearing a hoodie and my coat, and as it turns out, my car heater works exceptionally well. By the time I reached Rockford, IL, I had to pull over just to take off my coat.

But my battle with in-car climate control was only just beginning. When I had my heater going for a while, my car would get much too warm. Then I would roll down my window just a crack to cool down the car. I actually turned on the air conditioning a couple times for a few minutes. Unfortunately, my feet would get cold. I discovered the nifty little setting in my car that lets me aim the heater at my feet. It was swell.

The roads in Illinois are terrible. They’re bumpy and full of cracks and potholes. You’d think they’d take better care of their roads – especially the Interstate. There was very little traffic though. My decision to go through Bloomington instead of Chicago was a very wise one.

Indiana was more fun. The speed limit was 70 mph for a big stretch of the trip. I actually set my cruise control at 76-77 much to my delight. The speed limit on the freeway is 65 in Wisconsin, so I never get to go faster than 72 at home.

I arrived at my hotel at approximately 5:00pm eastern time. Tomorrow I will be driving through Kentucky, Tennessee, North Carolina and into South Carolina.

Things I Noticed Along the Way:

I drove past the world’s largest fireworks store. It struck me as somewhat odd that you can actually buy fireworks in February there. My brother-in-law would probably love that store.

There are loads of Cracker Barrel restaurants along the Interstate. I must’ve seen at least a dozen signs along the way, and quite possibly more than that. Funnily enough, my hotel is next to a Cracker Barrel. I almost ate there but instead opted for KFC which is right next to Cracker Barrel. Heh.

Illinois posts a minimum speed limit under the normal speed limit signs. I had never seen this before.

Illinois and Indiana both have a slower speed limit for semi-trucks. This is pretty cool as it generally makes them easier to pass.

The only area on my entire trip that had any congestion was the Interstate around Indianapolis. This struck me as odd because the Interstates in Wisconsin are usually jam-packed with cars.

In Indiana, you’re not allowed to stop, stand or park on the Interstate. They must’ve had problems with that before since they’ve posted a zillion signs informing drivers of this fact. They also seem quite obsessed with informing drivers that bridges may be icy. I guess Indiana is a safety conscious state.

Jan 10

Midweek Thoughts

I think snooze buttons on alarm clocks are stupid. Why not just set your alarm clock for the actual time you have to get up? Hitting the snooze button will only prolong your state of drowsiness. You’re better off getting up immediately and taking a shower. If that doesn’t perk you up then perhaps some coffee will. Either way, lingering in bed just seems silly to me.

It’s cold out today. But let’s face it, when you live in Wisconsin, every day in January is going to be cold. I don’t particularly care for cold weather. However, I do like enduring it. Surviving the winter makes me feel resilient and tough. By the time spring comes along I feel like I’ve really accomplished something. What did I accomplish you ask? I didn’t die.

I don’t like high quality pens. I’m left-handed, and because of the way I hold a pen when I write, the high quality ones always smudge. On the other hand, Bic pens are fantastic. Not only are they ridiculously cheap, but they never smudge for me either. You can keep your Uni-ball pens. I despise them.